Archive for Other Interests

The English Language

I think a retired English teacher was bored.

THIS IS GREAT!

Read all the way to the end…………….

This took a lot of work to put together!

You think English is easy??

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

 

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

 

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

 

4) We must polish the Polish furniture.

 

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

 

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

 

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

 

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

 

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

 

10) I did not object to the object.

 

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

 

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

 

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

 

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

 

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

 

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

 

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

 

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear..

 

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

 

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

 

 

Let’s face it – English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig..

 

And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

 

If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

 

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

 

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

 

PS. – Why doesn’t ‘Buick’ rhyme with ‘quick’ ?

 

 

You lovers of the English language might enjoy this ..

 

There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is ‘UP.’

 

It’s easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP ?

At a meeting, why does a topic come UP?

Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?

We call UP our friends.

And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver; we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen.

We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car.

At other times the little word has real special meaning.

People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.

To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special.

A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP.

We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night.

 

We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP!

To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look the word UP in the dictionary.

In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions.

If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used.

It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don’t give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more.

When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP.

When the sun comes out we say it is clearing Up.

When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things UP.

When it doesn’t rain for awhile, things dry UP.

 

One could go on and on, but I’ll wrap it UP,

for now my time is UP,

so……..it is time to shut UP!

Now it’s UP to you what you do with this email.

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July 2011 – Money Bags

The year of Money

Calendar for July 2011

Money bags

This year, July has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. This happens

once every 823 years. This is called money bags. So, share this with your friends and money will arrive within 4 days. Based on Chinese Feng Shui. The one who does not share will be without money.

Kinda interesting – read on!!!

This year we’re going to experience four unusual dates.

1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11, 11/11/11 and that’s not all…

Take the last two digits of the year in which you were born – now add

the age you will be this year,

The results will be 111 for everyone in whole world. This is the year of

the Money!!!

The proverb goes that if you share this with eight good friends money will

appear in next four days as it is explained in Chinese FENG SHUI.

Those who don’t continue the chain won’t receive…….

Its a mystery, but its worth a try. good luck.

Passing the Purple Hat

Passing the Purple Hat to You

In honour of women’s history month and in memory of Erma Bombeck who lost her fight with cancer.
Pass this on to five women that you want watched over. If you don’t know five women to pass this on to, one will do just fine.

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER – by Erma Bombeck
(written after she found out she was dying from cancer).

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.
I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage..
I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace…
I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased & sprayed.
I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, ‘Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.’ There would have been more ‘I love you’s’ more “I’m sorry’s.”

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute. Look at it and really see it .. . live it and never give it back. STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!!

Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what Instead, let’s cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us..

If you don’t mind, share this with all the women you are grateful to have as friends.
Maybe we should all grab that purple hat earlier.

A Candle Loses Nothing by Lighting Another Candle.
Please Keep The Candle Going!

By sharing this, you will think and realize how you’ve been blessed, up until now.
This is a disease which affects all families… no one is exempt!

Did You Know?

Playing With The Moon

 

 

Playing With The Moon

 

May you always have work for your hands to do.
May your pockets hold always a coin or two.
May the sun shine bright on your windowpane. 
May the rainbow be certain to follow each rain.
May the hand of a friend always be near you.
And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
– Irish Blessing

The Year 1908

THE YEAR 1908 – 100 years ago

Show this to your children and grandchildren


Shown above is a 1908 Ford Model-R automobile

This will boggle your mind, I know it did mine!

The year is 1908.
One hundred years ago.
What a difference a century makes!
Here are some statistics for the Year 1908 :

************ ********* ********* ******
The average life expectancy was 47 years.
Only 14 percent of the homes had a bathtub.
Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone.
There were only 8,000 cars and only 144 miles of paved roads.
The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 mph.
The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower!

The average wage in 1908 was 22 cents per hour.
The average worker made between $200 and $400 per year .
A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per year,
A dentist $2,500 per year, a veterinarian between $1,500 and $4,000 per year, and a mechanical engineer about $5,000 per year.

More than 95 percent of all births took place at HOME .

Ninety percent of all doctors had NO COLLEGE EDUCATION!
Instead, they attended so-called medical schools, many of which
Were condemned in the press AND the government as ’substandard. ‘

Sugar cost four cents a pound.
Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen.
Coffee was fifteen cents a pound.
Most women only washed their hair once a month, and used
Borax or egg yolks for shampoo.

Canada passed a law that prohibited poor people from
Entering into their country for any reason.

Five leading causes of death were:
1. Pneumonia and influenza 2. Tuberculosis  3. Diarrhea
4. Heart disease  5. Stroke

The American flag had 45 stars.
The population of Las Vegas , Nevada, was only 30!!!!

Crossword puzzles, canned beer, and ice tea had not been invented yet.
There was no Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.
Two out of every 10 adults couldn’t read or write.
Only 6 percent of all Americans had graduated from high school.

Marijuana, heroin, and morphine were all available over the counter at the local corner drugstores. Back then pharmacists said, ‘Heroin clears the complexion, gives buoyancy to the mind,regulates the stomach and bowels, and is, in fact, a perfect guardian of health’ …..( Shocking? DUH! )

Eighteen percent of households had at least one full-time servant or domestic help.

There were about 230 reported murders in the ENTIRE ! U.S.A. !

Now I forwarded this from someone else without typing it myself, and sent it to you and others all over  the world, via my Weblog on the Internet, in a matter of seconds!

Try to imagine what it may be like in another 100 years.

IT STAGGERS THE MIND!!!!

Write It On The Back or Front of Your Envelopes

Write It On The Back or Front of Your Envelopes

We think this is a great idea. We’ll start writing it on our envelopes too! –Including Bills!

You may have heard in the news that a couple of Post Offices in Texas have been forced to take down small posters that say

‘IN GOD WE TRUST ,’
The law, they say, is being violated.

Anyway, we heard proposed on a radio station show, that we should all write

“IN GOD WE TRUST”

on the back of all our mail.

After all, that’s our National Motto, and —–
all the money we use to buy 20 stamps.
We think it’s a wonderful idea.

We must take back our nation from all the people who think that anything that offends them should be removed.

If you like this idea, please pass it on and DO IT. The idea of writing or stamping……
‘IN GOD WE TRUST ‘
on our envelopes sounds good to us ..

SOME PEOPLE ARE HAVING A STAMP MADE TOO……..
lets use it as our signature on e-mails, too!

It’s been reported that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, we have a very hard time understanding why there’s such a mess about having ‘In God We Trust!’
on our money and having God in the pledge of Allegiance.

Could it be that WE just need to take action and tell the 14% to ‘sit down and shut up’?

If you agree, pass this on!!!

BUT REMEMBER IF YOU PASS THIS ON,

that’s one reason why this world is in the mess we’re in now.

WE SIT BACK & LET IT HAPPEN!!

IN  GOD  WE TRUST

Friends

Friends

God’s Handiwork – Northern Lights, Yellow Knife, Canada

These are spectacular and the teepees are so pretty in the dark but, check out that thermometer!

Northern Lights, Yellow Knife, Canada

This is a Fire Rainbow (below) – The Rarest of
all naturally occurring atmospheric phenomena.

The picture was captured this week on the
Idaho/Washington border.  The event lasted about one hour.

Clouds have to be cirrus, at least 20k feet in the air, with just the right
amount of ice crystals and the sun has to hit the clouds at precisely 58
degrees.

God’s handiwork. Beautiful sight! Pass along for others to see!!

Enlighten Perspective

Enlightened Perspective
Please Read all the way to the bottom:

If you will take the time to read these. I promise you’ll come away with an enlightened perspective.

The subjects covered affect us all on a daily basis:

They’re written by Andy Rooney , a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. Enjoy…….

I’ve learned…. That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I’ve learned…. That when you’re in love, it shows.

I’ve learned…. That just one person saying to me, ‘You’ve made my day!’ makes my day.

I’ve learned…. That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I’ve learned…. That being kind is more important than being right.

I’ve learned…. That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I’ve learned…. That I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.

I’ve learned…. That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I’ve learned…. That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I’ve learned…. That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I’ve learned…. That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I’ve learned…. That we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

I’ve learned…. That money doesn’t buy class.

I’ve learned…. That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I’ve learned… That under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I’ve learned…. That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I ‘ve learned…. That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I’ve learned…. That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I’ve learned…. That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I’ve learned… That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I’ve learned….. That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I’ve learned… That life is tough, but I’m tougher.

I’ve learned…. That opportunities are never lost, someone will take the ones you miss.

I’ve learned…. That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I’ve learned…. That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.

I’ve learned…. That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I’ve learned…. That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I’ve learned…. That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.

I’ve learned…. That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.

I’ve learned…. That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

And We Think It’s Cold

And we think its cold….LOL

Now Quit COMPLAINING that you are Cold!!

Poisonous Spider in Toilet

Though I found this email to be untrue at snopes: http://www.snopes.com/horrors/insects/telamonia.asp
I thought I’d share it because you never know???

NEW POISONOUS SPIDER IN THE UNITED STATES
A spider bite…………
And you thought the brown recluse was bad!!!

Three women in North Florida , turned up at hospitals over a 5-day period,
all with the same symptoms. Fever, chills, and vomiting, followed by
muscular collapse, paralysis, and finally, death.
There were no outward signs of trauma.
Autopsy results showed toxicity in the blood.
These women did not know each other, and seemed to have
nothing in common.

It was discovered, however, that they had all visited the same Restaurant
(Olive Garden) within days of their deaths. The health department
descended on the restaurant, shutting it down. The food, water, and
air conditioning were all inspected and tested, to no avail.

The big break came when a waitress at the restaurant was rushed
to the hospital with similar symptoms. She told doctors that she had
been on vacation, and had only went to the restaurant to pick up her check.
She did not eat or drink while she was there, but had used the restroom.
That is when one toxicologist, remembering an article he had read,
drove out to the restaurant, went into the restroom, and lifted the toilet seat.
Under the seat, out of normal view, was a small spider.
The spider was captured and brought back to the lab, where it was determined to be the Two-Striped Telamonia (Telamonia dimidiata), so named because of its reddened flesh color. This spider’s venom is extremely toxic, but can take several days to take effect. They live in cold, dark, damp
climates, and toilet rims provide just the right atmosphere.
Several days later a lawyer from Jacksonville showed up at a hospital
emergency room. Before his death, he told the doctor, that he had been
away on business, had taken a flight from Indonesia , changing planes in
Singapore , before returning home. He did not visit (Olive Garden),
while there. He did, as did all of the other victims, have what was determined
to be a puncture wound, on his right buttock.
Investigators discovered that the flight he was on had originated in India .
The Civilian Aeronautics Board (CAB) ordered an immediate inspection of
the toilets of all flights from India , and discovered the Two-Striped Telamonia (Telamonia dimidiata) spider’s nests on 4 different planes!
It is now believed that these spiders can be anywhere in the country.
So please, before you use a public toilet, lift the seat to check for spiders.
It can save your life!
And please pass this on to everyone you care about.

Precious Maher, age 4, sings

Cool

Pretty Cool

(Don’t ask me!  I don’t know how it’s done!!)


Read out loud the text inside the triangle below



More than likely you said, ‘A bird in the bush,’! and. ……..
if this IS what YOU said, then you failed to see
that the word THE is repeated twice!
Sorry, look again.



Next, let’s play with some words.
What do you see?


In black you can read the word GOOD, in white the word EVIL (inside each black letter is a white letter).
Now, what do you see?





You may not see it at first, but the white spaces read the word optical, the blue landscape reads the word illusion. Look again! Can you see why this painting is called an optical illusion?
What do you see here?


This one is quite tricky!

The word TEACH reflects as LEARN.


What do you see?


You probably read the word ME in brown, but…….
when you look through ME you will see YOU!
Do you need to look again?


Test Your Brain

This is really cool. The second one is amazing so please read all the way though.



ALZHEIMERS’ EYE TEST

Count every ‘ F ‘ in the following text:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS…

(SEE BELOW)

HOW MANY ?
WRONG, THERE ARE 6 — no joke.
READ IT AGAIN !
Really, go Back and Try to find the 6 F’s before you scroll down.


The reasoning behind is further down.
The brain cannot process ‘OF’.

Incredible or what? Go back and look again!!
Anyone who counts all 6 ‘F’s’ on the first go is a genius.
Three is normal, four is quite rare.




Look at the spinning woman and if she is turning right your right side of your brain is working . If she is turning left your left side of your brain is working . If she turns both ways for you then you have a 160 or better IQ.

More Brain Stuff . .  From Cambridge University .

Olny srmat poelpe can raed this.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty  uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig  to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the first and last ltteer be in the r ghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it wouthit a porbelm.   This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed this psas it on!!

Illusions

This will blow your mind, ESPECIALLY the last photo!
They’re all weird but #7 will blow your mind!!!

Just follow the directions as stated.

Is This Possible??
Focus on the dot in the center and move your head back and forth.
Are the purple lines straight or bent?
Do you see gray areas in between the squares?
Now where did they come from?
You should see a man’s face and also a word….
Hint: Try tilting your head to the right, the world begins with ‘L’
If you take a look at the following picture, let me tell you, it is not animated.  Your eyes are making it move.  To test this, stare at one spot for a couple seconds and everything will stop moving.  Or look at the black center of each circle and it will stop moving.  But move your eyes to the next black center and the previous will move after you take your eyes away from it….  Weird
Relax and concentrate on the 4 small dots in the middle of the picture for 30-40 secondsThen take a look at a wall near youYou will see a circle of light develop

What and/or Who do you see?

Is the book looking towards or away from you?

Southern Mail Boxes

These are so crazy.

Go here to see more:

http://www.rockinghamremembered.com/SouthernMailboxes.html

Optical Illusions on a Semi-Truck

These are 7 pictures of (German – European) semi-trucks whose trailers are decorated to look like the sides are missing and the products they are hauling are painted on the sides and back.

The first one is of a bottle of beer and looks so real, like it is coming out the side of the trailer.


Here’s the link to see more: http://www.premierphotographer.com/optical_illusions.html

Chinese Proverb:
“When someone shares something of value with you and you benefit from it, you have a moral obligation to share it with others.”

Small Steps

What small steps are taken to achieve freedom for us all.

This scene took place on a British Airways flight between Johannesburg, South Africa & London.

A white woman, about 50 years old, was seated next to a black man.  Very disturbed by this, she called the air hostess.  “You obviously do not see it then?” she asked. “You placed me next to a black man.  I did not agree to sit next to someone from such a repugnant group.  Give me an alternative seat.”
“Be calm please,” the hostess replied.  “Almost all the places on this flight are taken. I will go to see if another place is available.”

The hostess went away & then came back a few minutes later.  “Madam, just as I thought, there are no other available seats in Economy Class.  I spoke to the captain & he informed me that there is also no seat in Business Class.  All the same, we still have one place in First Class.”

Before the woman could say anything, the hostess continued.  “It is not usual for our company to permit someone from Economy Class to sit in First Class.  However, given the circumstances, the captain feels that it would be scandalous to make someone sit next to someone so disgusting.”

She turned to the black guy, & said, “Therefore, Sir, if you would like to, please collect your hand luggage, a seat awaits you in First Class.”

At that moment, the other passengers, who’d been shocked by what they had just witnessed, stood up & applauded.

This is a true story.  If you are against racism, please share this.

WELL DONE, British Airways

The Plan

Robin Williams, wearing a shirt that says “I love New York ” in Arabic.
The Plan!

You gotta love Robin Williams……
Even if he’s nuts! Leave it to Robin  Williams to come up with the perfect  plan. What we need now is for our UN Ambassador to stand up and repeat this message.

Robin Williams’ plan… (Hard to argue with this logic!)

“I see a lot of people yelling for peace but I have not heard of a plan for peace. So, here’s one plan.”

1. “The US will apologize to the world for our “interference” in their affairs, past & present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those “good ole boys”, we will never “interfere” again.

2. We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea , the Middle East, and the Philippines . They don’t want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.

3. All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave. We’ll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They’re illegal!!! France will welcome them.

4. All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!!!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don’t like it there, change it yourself and don’t hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don’t need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.

5. No foreign “students” over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don’t attend classes, they get a “D” and it’s back home baby.

6. The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.

7. Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don’t like it, we go someplace else (like Canada ! or Oklahoma !). They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)

8. If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not “interfere.” They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.

9. Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don’t need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.

10. All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us “Ugly Americans” any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH…learn it…or LEAVE…Now, isn’t that a winner of a plan?

“The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.” She’s got a baseball bat and she’s yelling, ‘you want a piece of me?’

Note:  this was an email sent to me I have no verification if Robin Williams actually said any of these.

Something Not To Laugh About

Something Not To Laugh About

If they know of him at all, many folks think Ben Stein is just a quirky
actor/comedian who talks in a monotone.  He’s also a very intelligent
attorney who knows how to put ideas and words together in such a way as to sway juries and make people think clearly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary:

Here with at this happy time of year, a few confessions from my beating heart:
I have no freaking clue who Nick and Jessica are. I see them on the cover of People and Us constantly when I am buying my dog biscuits and kitty litter.  I often ask the checkers at the grocery stores. They never know who Nick and Jessica are either. Who are they? Will it change my life if I know who they are and why they have broken up? Why are they so important?

I don’t know who Lindsay Lohan is either, and I do not care at all about Tom  Cruise’s wife.

Am I going to be called before a Senate committee and asked if I am a subversive?  Maybe, but I just have no clue who Nick and Jessica are.  If this is what it means to be no longer young. It’s not so bad.

Next confession:
I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish.  And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees Christmas trees.  I don’t feel threatened.  I don’t feel discriminated against. That’s what they are: Christmas trees. It doesn’t bother me a bit when people say, “Merry Christmas” to me.  I don’t think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto.
In fact, I kind of like it.  It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year.  It doesn’t bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu.  If people want a crèche, it’s just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away. I don’t like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don’t think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians.  I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period.  I have no idea where the concept came from that America is an explicitly atheist country.  I can’t find it in the Constitution, and I don’t like it being shoved down my throat. Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship Nick and Jessica and we aren’t allowed to worship God as we understand Him?  I guess that’s a sign that I’m getting old, too.  But there are a lot of us who are wondering where Nick and Jessica came from and where the America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it’s not funny, it’s intended to get you thinking.

Billy Graham’s daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her “How could God let something like this Happen?” (regarding Katrina).  Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response.  She said, “I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we’ve been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives.  And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out.  How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?”

In light of recent events…terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O’Hare (she was murdered, her body found recently) complained she didn’t want prayer in our schools, and we said OK.  Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school.  The Bible says thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself.  And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn’t spank our children when they misbehave because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock’s son committed suicide).  We said an expert should know what he’s talking about and we said OK.

Now we’re asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don’t know right from wrong, and why it doesn’t bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.

Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out I think it has a great deal to do with “WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.”

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world’s going to hell.
Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.
Funny how you can send ‘jokes’ through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.
Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.

Are you laughing?

Funny how you will not share it to many people because you’re not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you. Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us. Share this if you think it has merit.  If not, then just discard it… no one will know you did.  But, if you discard this thought process, don’t sit back and complain about what bad shape the world is in.

In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.

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